By Jim Murphy, Performance Coach

Author, Inner Excellence: Achieve Extraordinary Business Success through Mental Toughness

"Find a place within yourself where success and failure doesn't matter, a place where you can engage in battle without compromise."

- Jim Steen, Kenyon College swim coach, 50-time national champion

Have you ever felt the stress of performing at a big event and collapsed under the pressure? Most of us have. We want to perform our best when it counts the most, but

an intense desire to succeed often leads to tension or anxiety. The harder we try, the worse we perform.

Our sport can easily become a big weight on our shoulders. We set goals and pursue them valiantly, but setbacks arise and doubts come. Most of us have never been taught how to handle the endless stream of thoughts racing through our heads, the whispering voice of doubt, and the emotional ups and downs that life brings.

In my experience working with world-class athletes, seven things stand out that every high performance athlete should know. On February 12, 2010, athletes from all over the world will be in Vancouver to perform in the biggest event of their lives. If those athletes want to perform their best amidst the watchful eyes of millions of people, they may want to consider these seven keys to mental toughness.

1.Clarify your true pursuit

In the summer of 2004, Dawn Staley won her third gold medal at the Athens Olympics. One of the top female basketball players in the world, Staley thrived on the pressure of playing on the world's stage. Sport psychologist Doug Newburg interviewed Staley about her perspective on playing under pressure:

"Winning the gold medal is my goal, not my dream. My dream is about playing to win as often as possible with and against the best women basketball players in the world. Winning the gold medal as a goal gives me some direction, but my dream is something I need to live every day. And I'm doing that each time I play to win... When I'm playing to win, that's when I feel resonance. If I win, that's great. I want to win, and having the gold medal as my goal forces me to play to win. But what I love to do, what my dream is, is to play to win."

Dawn focused on her love of basketball, connected with that feeling, and let her goal of winning take care of itself. Dawn played to win, but it was not why she played. Basketball was a way for to use her gifts, to feel alive.

2. Focus on giving it your best shot, not beating your opponent.

Once you've clarified what you really want-the feeling behind the goal-then the key is to learn how to hone in on that. By far the biggest mistake most athletes and coaches make is focusing on what they can't control. In our North American culture, winning is everything. Winning, however, is the great distraction to performing. In order to win at the highest level, athletes must learn how to control the controllables. Your opponent is not one of them. How you feel is.

Legendary college football coach Frosty Westering won four national championships. One of his players stood up before one of their championships and said, "They're here to beat us. We're here to be us."

3. Know who the real opponent is

There is one opponent that you must always look out for, and that is your own self. It's your mind that can stop you dead in your tracks. Every athlete wants to feel confident, focused, and in control, but we all have a mind that thinks negative thoughts and broods over past failures. The great performers have learned how to cut off the negative thoughts (that will surely come) and replace them with empowering ones. Your mind, of course, can also propel you to unbelievable achievements.

4. Focus on the process, not the outcome (mastery, not ego)

Self-mastery is the pursuit of self-awareness, self-education, and self-discipline. Mastery seeks personal growth, whereas the ego seeks validation. Mastery wants to be good; the ego wants to look good.

Mastery focuses on winning the battle within, and the ego only wants to be better than others. Mastery is very controllable, whereas the ego's need for status and achievement are not in one's full control. With mastery there is self-confidence, and ego there is false bravado. And it all starts with self-awareness.

How are you feeling at this very moment? What about when you think about your upcoming event? How you feel is a reflection of what you're focusing on, what you desire (whether it's mastery-based or ego-based), and your physiology (your nutrition, exercise, posture, etc.).

5. Learn to lead with your heart

Leading with your heart means to be your true self, not getting caught up in comparison to others but focusing on what you're really passionate about. If you ski, why do you ski? What I love about skiing (or snowboarding) is the awesome connection to nature, being athletic and challenged, and becoming one with the mountain. If I were to race down the mountain I would focus on that connection, not who I was racing against.

6. Learn to expand your vision

As we discussed earlier, the biggest opponent we all face is our own minds. In our preoccupation with ourselves, we get reminded of all our failures, which cause us to look for validation somehow. In our continual search for validation, we want to have tangible things to show "I am somebody" because I won this medal or have this nice house. But those things are not in our full control, and so we often get down on ourselves.

An expanded vision, however, sees the beauty that is always there, waiting for clear eyes to see. There is always inner peace and confidence waiting for us to connect with, if we only lift our eyes above the horizon and see what's always been there.

7. Learn to be fully present

There is one thing that all great performers do, and that is they connect with the performance. When the time comes to perform, they are fully engaged in the moment with no thoughts of past or future, just a heightened awareness and no self-consciousness. This, of course, can be learned, and must be learned, if you want to excel and be your best.

You've been given a gift, as we all have. Don't let that gift give way to the pressure of outcomes out of your control. If others can live their dreams, you can too.

Jim Murphy, MHK, MNLP, is a Performance Coach specializing in helping elite athletes and teams perform extraordinarily under pressure. His second book, Inner Excellence (McGraw-Hill) arrives in stores across Canada and the US December, 2009. You can find out more about Jim on www.innerexcellence.com. You can reach him at jim@innerexcellence.com or 604-319-1905.